So i am  at home board out of my flippin mind i dont know what i am gonna do with my self. and i just signed up for my classes over the summer which makes me sad all the other college students go on trips all ove rthe place and what do i do, i stay home and take summer courses. this kinda bums me out because my days are gonna be filled with classes studyin for pcats and music, doesn't that sound like a shit load of fun. oh well thats the price i pay.

so ive been thinking about a lot of stuff lately concerning my parents. i try so hard to make them happy, not to do anything that would hurt them or shame them, and in return i am unhappy or stress myself out when thinking about what is best for them what they would expect. so ive decided that hey my parents dont have to know everything, and if i disappoint them sometimes that its gonna make up for the times when they were pissed at me for nothing. i dunno i just feel like i try so hard to make them happy and i am missing out on so much. or it could be the fact that i always have the fear that they are gonna wash their hands with me, which i dont think would happen because those of u who know me know i am pretty good with keepin a good replol. haha lol well thats that whatever happens happens. i am seriously in need of a good beach day it is long over due, i live in florida and about 30 mins away from the beach but do i see it lol